A Childs Self Worth - A New Paradigm

 Ever visit a Newborn Nursery? Row after row of newborn babies is wrapped in similar blankets and tiny caps; those who arrived healthy are placed in identical clear containers allowing the staff to quickly assess their needs. Some are quietly resting, diligently sucking their thumbs while others are clearly restless, uncomfortable and unhappy. Could there be more to what we witness as we stare at the babies than a wet diaper and a desire for food?

The newborn infant has arrived with everything the adult develops, including the awareness of a welcoming atmosphere. It is their first assessment of life in this new consciousness. Their innate instantly reads the energy around the birth sensing welcome relief, anxiety and even fear. Before the mother ever holds her baby it is very likely the child already knows what she is feeling about this arrival. That first determination remains in place, for many a lifetime, or until something significant develops that explains why emotions beside love and being welcome were perceived. The newborn has arrived without filters and delusion and receives an accurate interpretation of the emotions on their arrival.

The child who is welcomed, regardless of challenges and difficulties as they grow into childhood and adulthood never doubts that initial impression of being loved. This is the best beginning to allow a child to develop a high, balanced self-worth. They can stand tall or fall and know they are still loved and will be protected. They have little to fear and can accept responsibility for their actions, even when a bad choice has misdirected their actions. They can say, "I'm sorry" and mean it because they understand love and how to give and receive it. When an adult with their self-esteem at half-mast arrives in the presence of a child with a high, balanced self-esteem watch the child's reaction. "What's wrong with you, why do you act like that?" It is the difference in perception as two different kinds of consciousness collide. Healthy, balanced children immediately recognize an adult that is not and perceive, even in youth, that something is amiss; because it is.

The newborn that arrives and receives the message of fear or being unwanted and unwelcome are not only helpless, they are battered on arrival with no defenses to protect their own psyche. It is very difficult to find value in oneself when the people around you see no value. This child will very likely spend a lifetime trying to prove their worth, feeling less than those around them, accepting abusive relationships and unable to accept love. They don't understand what it means. Children who are abused rarely hate the abuser, they hate themselves for being powerless, weak, and all the things the abuser said was wrong with them. Years of counseling may or may not alter their perception of who they are or can become.

The emotions around the birth experience are vital to the newborn child's perception of life. Every woman experiencing birth is empowered with the opportunity to set the course for her baby by finding something to welcome and be happy about, even if for a brief moment. Birth is the most profound experience in any life.